"The more I feel imperfect, the more I feel alive." Jhumpa Lahiri, 'In Other Words'
"Beauty is the shadow of imperfection." - Simon Van Booy, 'Everything Beautiful Began After'.
Well, this seems to be an off- beat topic to discuss. You might have heard, read and attended a number of talks about perfection and how to strive for that. Here, we are looking at something that’s unconventional, something that is often overlooked by the majority. Who will want to embrace imperfection and be unsuccessful right?
We all might be advised to attempt for perfection and be successful. The irony is that, it’s the imperfection that brings the best in you. On the contrary, perfection leads to depression, anxiety, distance from oneself and others, feeling burnt out and losing the genuineness. It’s the imperfection that makes you give your best.
Life isn’t perfect. Like Salvador Dali says, “Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.”
"Life is not always perfect. Like a road, it has many bends, ups and down, but that’s its beauty." -Amit Ray, 'World Peace: The Voice Of A Mountain Bird'.
But as easy as it is told, it’s very difficult to accept the fact that you need to embrace imperfection. We all strive towards sheer excellence, making us crave for perfection. But, being natural and letting go of controlling the outcome are the best ways to hug the flaws we have. This helps us rise and grow.
Well, that doesn’t mean to nurture faults and not improve. It essentially means, accept the shortcomings, realize which are natural and which need improvement, learn from them and work on improving them. In the process, do not punish yourself or push yourself very hard to be perfect overnight.
Like, it's easier said and done. Let’s find the ways to be able to hold imperfection naturally and be comfortable in your own skin. Knowing that’s the most important factor to be your best version and continue to grow, these 5 simple ways will certainly help you to accept imperfections and gradually improve.
1. Accept yourself in the way you are
There is beauty in God's creation. If you are made the way you are with the flaws, it’s a beautiful thing. Of course, we don’t mean the flaws which hurt or harm others. The natural flaws you are gifted with make you unique.
Let’s say, you are too emotional, you always expect your close ones to reciprocate with a true heart like you do, you always want to materialize any commitment that you make to others and vice versa. These are some so-called “imperfections” which make you less than being pragmatic. But these are the beauty you have – the ones which make you unique and different from others.
True, these might be flaws standing in the way of practicality and result in you getting hurt. But these are not the qualities which deserve punishment or self-sabotage. You need to bring them to balance and not destroy these beautiful emotions you feel.
So, accept these emotions, embrace them, and then do self-inner work to be able to bring balance into it. Mindfulness meditation can help you achieve this. It might be hard to do it all alone at the start, but the best mindfulness certification programs can help you acquire these qualities.
“Perfection is an illusion.”
2. Love yourself
Instead of striving to be someone whom you are not, why not hug yourself? Improve yourself from a point of self-love, gratitude, freedom and joy. Have honest communication with yourself. Instill the qualities of courage, strength and power in yourself to be able to see yourself the way you are.
Even if you make a mistake, pat yourself on the shoulder and say “It’s fine, we will do it better next time.” No matter how far you are from being perfect, you are worthy of self-love and wholehearted wishes. Once you learn to express gratitude for what you already have and be self-compassionate, you will bear with the imperfections and do some real inner work to grow and transcend into a better soul.
3. Learn to let go and enjoy the process
You might be an overachiever, giving more than 100% in your endeavors. This is truly an amazing quality. But what goes wrong is the expectations. You give your effort and then expect the outcome.
Hoping and being positive for the outcome is a true quality a successful person has. But, trying to control the situation is not something which will let you grow. Your hard work will manifest in its own way. With people being obsessed with perfection, they tend to control the result.
But, if you let go of the outcome, things will manifest in the most beautiful way. So, learn to let go of it and continue to believe in the process. That’s an amazing way to embrace imperfection.
Enjoy the entire process you are going through. Trust that life is fun and the process is meant for you. Things happen for you and not to you. If life throws you obstacles, it's certainly meant to help you grow. If you have bigger dreams, you might have bigger challenges. So, be blessed. Feel exuberant about the process you are going through and it will highlight your imperfections. The more bends you have in life, the more you will be able to realize where your imperfections are. If they are positive, embrace them. If the emotions are negative (like fear, anxiety and frustration), learn to heal. Again, mindfulness meditation will be extremely helpful in this situation.
4. Do not be judgmental
“Be the change you want to see around you.” – a common old saying, isn’t it? Do you truly follow it? When you strive to be perfect, you tend to see the same reflection on others. As a consequence, you become too discerning and judgmental about others. Do remember, not everyone you come across in your journey is meant to be like you. Every single person has his/her own flaws and accepts them for who they are. Do not be criticizing or judgmental about them. By accepting others in the way they are you can learn to embrace imperfection.
5. Prioritize yourself
This is one of the keys to embrace imperfection. Keep yourself above all and learn to be joyous with yourself. Being perfect is an easy way to mask your flaws. You do that when you don’t give yourself priority in the way you are. You are more concerned about other things about you and how they perceive you. In the process, you forget to prioritize yourself and put others of top importance above you. Do just the opposite. See yourself as the most important person in the entire journey.
If you are unable to make these transformations all by yourself, seek guidance from a life mentor. Be it being a mindfulness practitioner or undergoing life leadership coaching, a certified coach like Dr Paras can do it with all flair and passion. His widespread experiences and connection to life purpose give him the vision to transform every life. He has already transformed a lot of successful people across the globe and you can be the next one. Be fortunate to be enlightened under his teachings. Visit the website to know more about a number of processes.