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Know the Art of Mindful Apology


Dr. Paras
Dr. Paras
Feb 10, 2022

As defined by IIUEF - (IINNER UNIVERSE EDUCATION FOUNDATION), "Mindfulness is a psychological and spiritual process of evolving and growing the awareness of body, mind, and spirit with observing, questioning, and reflecting the core of the practice. These enable people to live in the moment, gain accountability, emotional sensitivity, and build effective communication with self, others, and the environment. It's about developing the ability to detach self from fantasies and unconscious patterns, or beliefs picked up that serve no purpose. Mindfulness works to create balance and equanimity within."

A conscious apology stems from a clear understanding of the negative implications of, or an error in, our line of thought, something we've said, or an overt action we've taken.

Our mindfulness practices can assist us in crafting an effective apology by evaluating all components of it, from purpose to application and beyond.

According to the book 'one minute apology written by Margret McBride, Ken Blanchard', the toughest part of an apology is to accept that you were wrong.

When well-intended and thoughtfully delivered, an apology may be one of life's most potent elixirs for both the giver and the receiver.

Mindful apology is a way of accepting that no human is perfect. It is an essential part of some fields like psychology, life coaching, hypnotherapy, etc. Mindfulness combined with the power of accepting your mistakes and forgiving the other person can help us live a wonderful life.

Be it our personal lives or workplace, we often come across various situations in which we either hurt someone or feel hurt from something. In such cases, it is always a good option to understand mindful apology by working with a NLP or life coach

Life coaching focuses on many aspects of life, like communication, emotional intelligence, and mindful apology and many more.

All this combined help us get better at this art and live a peaceful life.

Why is it necessary to forgive?

Forgiving and letting go lightens your burden and makes you feel free. It also has a significant impact on your mind. When you are hurt, cortisol hormone is released, which is also known as the stress hormone and is associated with the sympathetic nervous system. This hormone not only affects the brain but also creates an impact on the other organs of the body, ultimately damaging physical health.

When we forgive or apologize, oxytocin which is also known as the love hormone, is generated, which reduces the ill effects of cortisol.

What should you ask yourself before offering an apology?

What am I trying to accomplish by making my apology? Do I want to alleviate the suffering of people I have harmed? Do I want to make amends or prevent a recurrence of a mistake? Is there some advantage I'd like to acquire by apologizing? Some of the other questions you can ask yourself are: Do I genuinely comprehend the harm (actual or potential) caused by my blunder, and am I willing to admit it without making excuses or providing explanations? Do I accept responsibility for my role in the events that occurred?

Do I have regrets? Do I have a sense of guilt after admitting that I made a mistake — would I go back and change my behavior if I could?

Is it okay for me to make amends to demonstrate and raise the possibility that I will not repeat my mistake? Is it true that I am sorry enough to make an effort to change?

How much do I care about the outcome of my apology? Is an apology sufficient in itself, or does it require a specific observable effect to be considered worthwhile?

There is a quote in 'one minute apology' that says, "Apologize not for the outcome but because you know that you were wrong and that is the right thing to do."

Going back in the past and reliving the moment to seek an apology or forgive can be challenging. Therefore, to be mindful and help yourself, you can also perform an exercise.