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When Positive Affirmations Don't Work: Common Pitfalls to Avoid

The Reasons Positive Affirmations Sometimes Don't Work For You

Dr. Paras
Dr. Paras
Nov 14, 2022
Why positive affirmation sometimes don't work for you?

Have you heard about how powerful positive affirmations are? Trust, they are incredibly strong and effective. If you read “The Secret '' or have seen the movie in Amazon Prime, you might have at least given a thought to visualisations about dreams, goals, happiness and success. Have you tried it? Did it work? If, then nothing like it. Congratulations to you to have achieved the most incredible thing in the world.

But, hold on. If it still has not worked for you and you are doubting if something is wrong with the theory of affirmations, then take a step back. The issue is not with the theory, but has something to do with “Your” affirmations. It’s a truth and will certainly work out, only if carried out in the right way.

Your energy is where your focus flows.” Every word you murmur, chant, say out loud and every thought that comes in your head carries a great amount of energy. So, if you are wondering why affirmations don’t work, here is an interesting and secret food for thought which can change your life once and for all.


9 Reasons Why Positive Affirmations Don't Work For You

1. So, Your Energy Might be Resistant

You might be chanting out loud “I am successful” 11 times a day, but every single time your mind might be resisting and saying “No you can’t be successful.” If your mind thinks you are not capable of being successful, your subconscious will think the same. Just saying positive affirmations without believing in them makes no impact. 

2. You Are Just Following the Norm

You might have been suggested to positively affirm and that’s what you are doing. You are just following a routine to positively affirm to see something positive. But, do you really think about the affirmations or say them with the meaning engrained to your heart? Do not just recite; understand the meaning and then say them out. “Set the intentions right along with reciting.”

3. Take Action

There is a myth that visualisation and positive affirmation will bring the required outcome. It can, but only at times. Rest of the times you really have to take the necessary action. When you take the required steps, that’s when the Universe recognises your true intentions and understands your desires. Accordingly, the energy flows to align with your wishes.

4. You are Overindulging

Positive affirmations do not mean you overdo them. Striving for your goal while visualising your dreams doesn’t mean aiming for perfection. We are human beings and flaws are a natural part of us. Being perfect kills the entire experience of being natural and best. Do not be afraid to be who you actually are. Do not be worried about what others might think about you. Hence, don’t overindulge in actions and affirmations. Do it to the best of your ability and push yourself only till the limit you can take.

5. You Are Expecting

While you are affirming, the intention is to achieve the best and give the best. However, expecting that it will certainly happen can be counter-effective. Believing and trusting it will happen for you and expecting it are two different things. The latter keeps you in a lack mentality where your subconscious thinks that you don’t have it and desperately wants it to happen.

As a result, the outcome is further pushed away from you. Instead, when you affirm, believe that you already have it and achieved it. Visualise that you have accomplished what you are aspiring for. Let the subconscious believe that it’s happening in reality and that way the outcome will be directed towards you.

6. You are Getting Too Attached

We, human beings, have a tendency to get attached to anything and everything. Be it a person, a pet, an object, an outcome or an event, we tend to associate it with us in every possible way. 

Let’s say, you want a certain job for financial security. You work hard for it, positively affirm and visualise as well. But you believe that if it doesn’t happen, it’s the end of the world. Do you feel that there is no other way that can give you financial security? Well, there might be 10 better ways than this which you are not recognising. If you believe that you will be desolate if you don’t get this job and get desperate to achieve this, it might not work for you. Take action, set right intentions, affirm, visualise and manifest. That’s all. Rest, leave it to the universe and be happy.

Learn more about Matrrix's dual coach certification program.

7. You are Controlling the Outcome

While affirming, are you trying to control the result? Let’s say, you want to scale high in your career with tremendous financial growth and bring in all pleasures. That’s absolutely wonderful and it’s so great to see you be ambitious. But, hold on for a sec! By when do you want that? Do you already have a timeline in mind? 

Are you desperately trying to achieve the outcome by a specific date? Well, you are actually trying to control the outcome without trusting the process. The best things will happen at your divine time. If you believe, then leave the outcome on the Universe and let go. Who knows, your divine time might be next year or earlier this year where you will receive more than you can ever imagine? Let the Universe surprise you!

8. You Are Chasing, Not Attracting

While affirming, it might happen that you are trying to chase an outcome. There is a heavy and critical difference between chasing and attracting. You can read up some important articles on this or listen to some meaningful videos and podcasts delivered by life coaches. When you attract, the affirmations work. When you chase, you push the outcome away.

9. You Don’t Love Yourself

No matter how many affirmations you chant or how frequent you chant, the thing above all is to love yourself. Do you experience self-love? Are you open to the fact that even if the outcome isn’t favourable to your desire, you will still love yourself? Will you give yourself a pat on the back saying that “It’s okay, it’s happening for my good and I trust that better things are lying ahead.” That’s called self-love.

Will you take yourself out for a nice scoop of ice-cream, not just when you are promoted, but also when you are shoved away while your organisation puts the crown on your competitor? Whatever be the circumstance, loving yourself and holding your own hands is the most precious thing. 

Do remember, it's just you who will never leave you under any situation. So, be it a good or bad, treat yourself well and never punish yourself. Hold yourself with compassion. And, at the end – there is nothing called bad. Every single thing happens for good; the outcome might not just be desirable to you at the moment, but has happened for your long-term benefit.

Practicing affirmations in the right way is very important, else it can become very counterproductive. Why don’t you seek expert guidance from a life coach who knows the in and out of this? 

Dr Paras is an amazing life mentor who has coached so many individuals transforming their lives in incredible ways. The life leadership mentor is an award winning and certified coach who has experienced miracles of affirmations personally and has customized sessions to guide you step by step to shape your life in the most effective way.

You might also be interested to know the NLP techniques. Well, Brand Matrrix offers the best NLP Certification in India, approved by the society of neuro-linguistic programming - Dr. Richard Bandler. Dr Paras, an authorized trainer by Dr. Richard Bandler spearheads all the programs. Check out the website to understand the exclusive programs he offers, recommended by John La Valle (President of The Society of Neuro-Linguistic Programming).


Dr. Paras


Dr. Paras

ICF-certified (Master Certified Coach) and ESIA -Coach Supervisor Dr. Paras, and Co-Founder of Dr Paras Wellness Pvt. Ltd. with brand Matrrix has been focused towards initiating change and transformation in people. As a certified Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) Master Practitioner and Mindfulness Coach, he brings a fresh approach towards learning the psychology of one’s thinking and behavior patterns. In his 18 years’ journey, he has trained, coached and mentored over 1.5 lakh individuals while certifying over 240 coaches. The leadership development programs of Matrrix have honed over hundreds of professionals while resolving workplace issues and ensuring higher ROI for firms.

Dr. Paras uses the power of coaching, counseling and positive psychology frameworks to resolve organizational issues, manage internal conflicts, and accelerate business growth. His programs for professional certifications in NLP, Mindfulness, Counseling, Coaching, and more have solidified his name as a transformation coach. Dr. Paras is also the founder of the Iinner Universe Education Foundation that runs Tava-Mitram (not-for-profit) to improve emotional wellness. He is also an avid blogger and social media enthusiast who loves keeping in touch with his international audience.

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